The fiction we live.

a long, overdue update

2010-10-14T11:08:00.002+08:00

sorry, it's been a long while.
haven't been bothered blogging lately, to be honest but yeah, here I am.
so, what has happened over the past few weeks I hear you might ask?
not too much at all, the usual studies, exams, 2 week break filled with work, gossipgirl, mr. bean marathons, the perth royal show, the beach, retail therapy, &basically, overall, chillaxing.
jake's 18th is coming up this saturday &i will be going to carousel later tonight to get his present, the weekend after is lils 16th &we're all pitching in to get her her present too. so many birthdays and events are coming up in the next few months, and there are only these last few months before the end of 2010 and before we know it, it'll be a brand new year, with me and jake's 1 year anniversary to look to, christmas, & new years. only something ridiculously short, like four weeks of my diploma to go. i've got to do well, stick it through the end for just another short bit &i'll be indulging in &rewarded with a good summer break. the family, myself along with a few friends are planning to head up north somewhere to just get out of town maybe over christmas to just spend some much needed quality time together and just take in and enjoy the scenery. besides that, there's not much else i can say for now. will update you soon enough on how everything works out in the next few, if i'm motivated enough to blog again anytime soon. it was a pleasure updating. laters

The fragment of hope at the end of the rainbow

2010-09-11T20:15:00.005+08:00

"I lied when I told you I forgot. I know it doesn't seem like a big thing but I wanted to tell you the truth and never, ever lie to you. Because that's how it starts."

so, this was on our way to mandurah. we saw the end of the rainbow &unfortunately for us we couldn't find the pot of gold :(

do you see it just there, up ahead? it's the end of the rainbow:o)!

& we drove past it too! :)))

'Love is giving someone the power to destroy you, but trusting that they won't. Love is giving someone the ability to hurt you, but trusting them not to.'
I trust you, I do with all my heart.

k, it's been a while but this'll be just a quicky today, 'cos i really, really should be studying right now- with my 5 exams coming up in the next two weeks :( wish me luck!
yeah &the above are some photos we took of the end of the rainbow we saw on our way to mandurah! :*)

Sweep everyrhing under the rug, and eventually it will trip you up
and the fall would be far greater than what it intially would have been.

The best we ever had

2010-08-16T14:29:00.012+08:00

"And though you may not imagine what I was like, I did live. More importantly, I loved."

Why do I get the feeling that I've fallen short of, and disappointed your expectations sometimes? :(

"Only because it's so raw and real. Soon I'll just be a series of images that flash through your mind, when you least expect it. And after that, only a few will stay. Then, one. A memory of a memory."

I'm okay, I always have been

2010-08-10T17:25:00.020+08:00

I like to believe that I'm stronger than this, sometimes.

This was taken after I got home from tafe today.
I was trying to pretend that I wasn't exhausted or heaps tired.

Hello, hello, how are we? :)

So I've come home from tafe just reccently with quite a headache and daa freaking aching back and am currrently being confronted by mountain of essays, piling up so high it's improssible for them to not be toppling over!

I've got to get them all done and out of the way so I dont have to stress about them whilst camping at mandurah this weekend!
Anyway, I might update about my experience at camp when I get back, if I have time or feel like it!

I'm off to hit the books now!
La-la-la-laters! :)

X

Nobody said it would be easy.

'Cause you had a bad day

2010-08-08T21:19:00.005+08:00

I am bored.
Work today was stupid.
You know what?
Customers aren't always right.
Noone can ever be ALWAYS right!
So whoever the hell thought of that, can take it, shove it up their pipe and smoke it!
Man, I shouldn't be bored right now 'cause I've got more than enough untouched assignment to be done but here I am, blogging.
Gah, I feel old :'(
I've only just turned 18 this year and here I am thinking I might have back problems and the rest of it.
It might have something to do with the way I sit.
Did I mention? I have such greaaat posture!
I'm such an unorganised person and it does show in the way I write.
I write in no real order and of things here and there.
Yeah, anyway this is one of them pointless sort of posts, for the sake of updating and to compensate for the lack in updates.
Heh, er 'kay.. &that is all.

I've noticed I always finish with 'til next time' so ima break the routine and end in
TOODLES POODLES!
k, bye!

This is how you remind me, of who I really am

2010-08-04T13:17:00.022+08:00

I know, I know, it's been a while...

For anyone that might find any particular interest or enjoyment in reading this , for I wouldn't have a clue why.. I apologise for the delays in/not updating.
Yes, just so you know, I haven't completely fallen off the face of the world.

Here are some pictures for you :)

ze boyfriend's jumpiour :)
HOW TO KISS. LESSON 101
yeah, don't mind us
we're only just fully making out here
oh my, what crooked teeth you have,
all tha better to eat you with
You know, I like it from behind
Mm aah mm ooh yeah baby

I promise to not take your ear off, if you promise that you'll stay?:)
Jake and Felicia
Pictures taken on the 3rd of August 2010 (which was yesterday) on Felicia's dodge lappy camera

I've really got to start freaking studying, really. Yes and so I apologise in advance for the lack of updates in the near future (so, for maybe for the next 3 or so week) So yes, this is just a quick shoutout to let you's all know that I'm still alive, well and breathing.

'Til next time!

Because it made me smile

2010-07-28T21:20:00.004+08:00

Falling bit behind on the workload atm, now that've started sem2.

But nonetheless, a quick update, cause it's been a whil

Hopefully you would've been like 'oh what? uh, duh!'

Aha :')

'Til next time:)

This could be nothing, but I'm willing to give it a try

2010-07-16T17:06:00.003+08:00

Dream.

Believe.

Succeed.

Hello all!
I'm rather bored and am pretty much just updating for the sake of updating.
Seeing Jake t'night! :)
Might go back to his place and just chill.
So yes, how are we?
Although the holidays, for me have been quite boring, I've had a pretty good, chillaxing past few days and'll be back on my way to starting semester 2, pretty soon in the next week:)
What can I say? I'm actually quite looking forward to learning about law of torts and the rest of it.
Enthusiasm.
Must be a good thing, right?

So it's winter at the moment and apparently that's when we tend to eat/ put on more because our bodies need the fuel to burn and keep us warm with and so on and so forth...
So, just recently I decided that I want to start working out again to get in better shape
&yes easier said than done because I've thought this for quite some time now.
But to be honest, every time I've thought this, I go into a phase with eating healthy, exercising for about two weeks or something and then fall out of it and then back into again and right back out ;/
But yesterday I put it to action and realised just how un-fit I've become...
Before I could even manage more than 50 sit-ups, I realised that I had to remind myself to not forget to breathe ;x
I forgot how much working out freaking hurts and kills but man, if I want results I've got to keep at it right?
So yeah, hopefully, that's what I'll do.
Stick it through.
Yeah, haven't got much else right now so um numnum, yeah:)
'Til next time! :)
X

If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world?

2010-07-14T15:16:00.006+08:00

Sleepless nights.

Tossing and turning.

Lack of sleep.

Positively tired.

Sleep deprivation.

But you make it all okay...:)

So. How is everyone's holiday's going so far?

(for those that are on holidays, sorry for those that are not)

Going over her boys t'night for dinner, &to just chill before the start of next semester.

We're going to maybe bake a cake and might watch 'the invention of lying':o) yay!

Yeah, that's all I got:)

'Til next time!

Hellogoodbye

2010-07-10T23:13:00.007+08:00

had both dim sum and 'all you can eat' buffet dinner at the greyhounds today.
i wonder sometimes, how much more weight i want to put on

ah yes, i just wanted to post this before i forget.

i got bangs:)

but i cut it too short so it currently looks fugly,

&yay for an erruption of breakouts!

my skin is really not treating me very well and hating me at the moment

nonetheless, here are some photo's..

so um, old hair

new hair, well fringe &i dyed it darker to get rid of my highlights

the random longlish but to the side was the length i orginally got it cut to but still thought it was a bit long &decided to fix it myself. bad mistake, i should have learnt by now but it's like i never seem to. i felt th need to cut it shorter cause it was sitting over my eyes and now it's too short.

so yeah, i'm kinda like waiting for it to grow back.

that's it for now.
'til next time:)

You don't have to weather the storm alone

2010-07-10T21:11:00.018+08:00

You're all talk, nothing ever gets done

aka

'Always talking, nothing doing.'
-Mr Jake Chong

(add an asian accent onto that and there you have, almost a perfect quote) :o)Miss Felicia Poh,

You are a forgetful one. You need to write things down constantly to remember things. You write to yourself quite some bit to remind yourself how the your week was, anything new you've learnt and what you've been up to recently. The above print was put there for a reason. It was put there because it expresses perfectly how you've been feeling over the past week. Felicia, it's okay, everyone has their insecurities. You just need to not let yours get in the way of things. You know Jake loves you for who you are, that he won't ever let you down, he'll catch you when you fall, he calls you back when you hang up on him, is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have you and'll practically do anything to show how much you mean to him. So then why have you been so worried and insecure just recently? It's because you're worried that your past and a certain karma will catch up with you and because you trust in him so much, you are just so on edge, worried and cautious that he might be the one to disappoint you and let you down, when you least expect it and you don't expect it is why you're worried. Don't worry, Jake is nothing but good for you and him hurting you would be the last thing to worry about. He's always been there and always will be there to reassure you. You have nothing in the world to worry about.

A second thing, over the past 7 months, you slowly realise that you have had a change in attitude and the way you think things. You have been thinking more so positively and optimistically rather than 'never' and 'it is impossible'. It is no coincidence that these influences have occurred over the period of time where a certain someone has stepped into your life and influenced changes over you, for the better. It would make perfect sense then to say that you owe special thanks to that certain somebody. That certain somebody would be Jake. Stay in my life okay? 7 months and still counting... This isn't for the sake of just another teenage relationship. You're serious about the two of you. You want it to work and know that it will with the co-operation from both parties, it will. Try not to deny your feelings. He means more to you than you could ever express to him but you can always try. Sometimes, you don't get a second chance at things so don't screw it up. Trust that you'll always be there for one another, as you will. Share your feelings with him, you know that he'll always be there to listen so don't hide things. If you feel a certain way, just say so, he will not look at you any differently, he will not judge. You and I both know that, so don't make it so difficult.

Another thing, dad and you have never been close and probably never will be. You've learnt now that he will always discourage you and that doesn't mean that in the time left, you should give up or not try to make an effort to make amends. This is probably his way to get you to pick yourself up and throw yourself even higher, to prove him wrong and it works. You've always managed to do it, every time he looks you down. You should have gotten used to and grown accustomed to this by now, you haven't and might not ever but maybe you don't have to. Maybe you just need to learn and remember that that was the way he was raised, that was what he was taught and that is how he expresses his feelings, quite strangely. You need to stop thinking that the difference between the two of you are too great and that there is no room for improvement. You know that it's the mentality, so if you think like that, there won't be. As for your mum, you both are always, always constantly bickering, fighting, fighting and fighting. You need to put a stop to this. Stop bickering. You need to hear what each other have to say and work out your mis-understandings. It is easier said than done but who's to say that you can't start trying? One day, your parents won't be around anymore to set you straight on your path and guide you through. You know this, that this day will come around, is why you need to start learning now to be independent and to start relying more on yourself. Make the most of your time with them and appreciate the things they do for you while they're still around. They may not always be right and you know that but they only want what's best. No parent would want something that's not good for their child.

You might not be able to do a lot about how you feel but you sure as hell can do something about the way you act. Sometimes you need to fall to learn what's right, what doesn't kill you can only make you stronger. Let go of the past, you can't change it. Live in the present and work towards the future. Stop thinking you'll just 'go with the flow.' don't be always taking chances. What if the flow just left off to nowhere, really? Don't wander around aimlessly, with no goal, no dream, no provision, no future to look to. Know what you want, know what you're going to have to do to get it and work hard, put in solid effort and work towards it. You can and will do better this semester. I'm just going to say it loud and clear now so that it is cemented in your head. Lastly, don't forget to smile and keep smiling. 'Never let success get to your head and your failures get to your heart.'

With love,

Yourself.

You make a substantial point, however, your mum

2010-07-08T15:12:00.007+08:00

'You can make the world beautiful, just by refusing to lie about it.'
'When sadness was the sea, you were the ones that taught me to swim'
Sometimes, there is no second chance. Think, you've only got one shot at it, do it well.
Yay for very charming, unsleezy looks!
un-speded moments

Hello hello, how are we?

I have a feeling this is going to be just another rather unorganised post of mumbo-jumbo, just of jotting down thoughts, feelings and things that have happened over this past week.

It feels good to type with my real, natural nails &not them fake, manicure, acrylic nails I had on for my 18th :)

Yes, so. What's new?

Finally and about time, I got my L's! (this was yesterday) and now have no excuses to keep delaying learning how to drive. I'll just think of it this way, it'll be easier for me to get around. Just please, please, please give me my mum's driving skills and not my dads! thankyou.

To bang or not to bang the fringe?

That is the question...

Hm, for a while now, I've realised, that I am good at putting on acts because sometimes that's all you can do in life, plaster on a fake smile and stick it through but you know what, Jake has taught me that this isn't good for me. It's better to be who you really are, express how you really feel and just be yourself. I mean afterall, we're all only human, so what we feel, other probably have felt too right? It's okay to have feelings or a set of emotion, we're not robots.

Yes, yes so I think that is all.

I might go change my hair now.

'Til next time:)

If I can't set a good example, learn from my mistakes

Scarves are choking hazards

2010-07-06T14:48:00.005+08:00

Dear self,

On this day, you have thought about, pictured and imagioned what it might be like to lose a dear loved one, that means too much, you couldn't picture life without them.

While you've picture this, you felt a sense of loss, hopelessness, grief, anger, sadness, confusion, angst, unhappiness, depression.

You've thought about why this might be and ponder on all the things that've been said, left unsaid, all the actions, inactions and everything in between the effort and appreciation you've been and haven't been able to express.

You wonder why and how this could have been and why, why it had to happen this way, why it couldn't have been different.

You want to wake up from all of this, to that person rubbing your back, hugging you tightly,

Telling you that it was all just a bad dream, that everything'll be okay,

But it never happens,

You then realise that all this is just a wake-up call from reality to treasure, appreciate, acknowledge and hold close those that you really love, that you care about.

You learn not to take for granted,

To cherish every moment,

You learn not to put on silly acts just because you don't want to seem like you care.

You learn what true love really is,

That the difference between pain and love is time,

You learn what it feels like to have security yanked out from right under your feet,

That what you make and what you do with your time is more thanyou'll ever fathom and should be treated as such...

Your learn to smile more and appreciate the little things in life

and to continue to smile...

From, you, Felicia.

In a place between sick &healthy...
&finally, after 3 sleepless nights, I managed to cry myself to sleep at 3am this morning after having silly, abstract images play through my subconscious mind.
None of this would've hardly ever been worth mentioning before.
However, these strange, bizzare images that played through my mind, last night were in future tense, of 'what ifs' & of things that could happen.
It made me feel terribly afraid of the things that I have potential to lose.
I don't know why but it seems as if Ive been rather emotionally un-stable.
Maybe it was some sort of sign.

Truth be told, I am quite frightened by the saying 'what goes around, comes around'
I'm still waiting for that something to come around and it now feels as though I am partially living in fear.
It's been a while since this has happened to me now, I remember back in the day when this was routinal but up until quite reccently, it's been okay.
Hmm, a bit of a heavy post.
Anyway, enough of that.
It's k, seeing Jake soon!
He's on his way to pick lils &I up soon as we are going to go watch Eclipse tonight, so we can critique it together!
It's cheap tuesday &I wouldn't pay to see it anyother time:)
K, til next time!

Update/ Informal ramble

2010-07-02T00:26:00.013+08:00

I love you

Thought I might update, so hello:)

What can I say?

The last exam was pretty ew.

&I had to re-sit that today for I left outcome 2 blank the first time I sat it as I wasn't informed about all the focus questions we had to study which is why some of the stuff that came up in the exam, I didn't know we had to study for and ironically, they were worth the most marks!
Yeah, that was disappointing, cause in all my other outcomes I achieved at least above a 80% in each &it was just that one outcome that let me down, which meant that when I went &re-sat it, I would only get a 50% mark, overall

So I re-sat the exam &got a fifty percent :o(

That was a real big let down.

Yeah, but whatever, I passed

&'ll beat myself up over it if I don't make up for it next semester.

I paid my tafe fees today for next semester,
there goes another 300, gone.

&so I've got a two week break at the moment,

&in these two weeks I would like to accomplish-
a) freaking start learning to drive already,
(cause I've said I would for a while now &STILL haven't. Is there a term for fear of driving? Cause I don't know, I just can't picture me operating a moving vehicle without destroying something:(..)
& b) get my fitness back up!

My limbs hurt so much right now, my hammy on the inside of my right thigh &both my arms feel dead as, I think I'm getting old. Too much walking &carrying
It's kind of sad because my arms hurt like hell only from carrying Rudin's baby brother, Ryan around the city the other day:/
My knee is also splattered with bruises at the moment,
from falling on the same place, twice. Both times, right in front of mum ;x

Once, i just got home from a night out with Jake &went to say hi to my mum in the living room, slipped and fell onto my knee. The second time, I got up off my chair, slipped and again, fell straight onto that same knee:(

I'm sorry, right knee! mum was seriously like 'woooeah, what is wrong withyou'

Freaking realised how fit I've gotten when I took a run around the oval the other day. made it around but after that my muscles just felt so stiff, tense &un-relaxed, the run around the oval that should have warmed me up, didn't. I mostly blame the weather (cause it was cold) & I didn't stretch or warm up or anything, BUT STILL! I need to build my fitness back up, up, up!
Yes, so that's that!

What else?
Mmm, yeah my relatives from melbourne visited just reccently.
They stayed in perth for a few days and are now currently in HK but will be on their way back to perth shortly to stay for a few days before they're headed back to Melbourne.
Haven't seen them for a while. It's been something like 5 years now?

And my cousins are so grown up! The last time I saw my little cousin Vince, he was 10 & i remember this time when he sat on my lap &cried while watching "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets' with us in the theatres,
&after 5 years of not seeing him, his voice has broken, he's grown taller, he talks less &is more mature! &back then I had only just finished primary & started high school or something..
Oh my, how time flies!

I've finished high school now &need to start learning to be more independant &start looking out for myself, this meaning to takecare of my health when I feel myself getting sick and to stop leaving my purse/phone/bag on trains and buses and stuff...
Yeah, think I'm starting to get of topic, if there even was one to begin with?

Anyway, think my post ends here.

Til next time!

Fringey

2010-06-29T11:43:00.010+08:00

old, grown out, cruddy non-exisitent fringe...
my cookie monster top:B &my chubbay, fattay face

slightly shorter, trimmed new fringe:)
i was thinking about getting bangs but i didn't wana go tooo short, we'll see..

taken on my poor quality phone cameraaaar!

my face looks pointy here, ehee ahhh.. cameraar angles

i'm getting my hair coloured soon too!

maybe after this week.

going darker to get rid of all my highlights:)

POST-EXAMS

2010-06-25T23:41:00.009+08:00

Well, here are some pictures for you from during exams, &when i didn't have time to update-

This was us, in the car on the way to or from the airport (i can't remember) when our relatives were headed back to sg
me, mum &samantha just me
jake: 'felicia, stop perving at little kids'

felicia: 'you said you wouldn't tell :('

They say a picture tells a thousand words,

Well, here's a few thousand for ya-

Post Exams!
What can I say?
So, so, so so so glad that's over!
Need I say more?

Not left with a great feeling about my last exam actually. I'm not even kidding, my last exam made me cry

I'm hoping &praying that I passed.

Since, I've finished my examsssss (yes, 5 s' cause there were 5 of them)-
Jake's been able to get me to relax a little,

We ate out at Fast Eddy's at carousel last night,
& went to go watch 'Grown ups'
Which was a reasonably okay movie,
Despite the cruddy mood i was in from my last exam.

As we finished our film and were headed back home,
We were slowly reversing out of the parking lot, when some idiotic driver cuts out of nowhere which caught us off guard and threw us off attention.
While still reversing out slowly and now slightly pissed off, we didn't notice the car behind us &(not too badly though) managed reversed into it.
The car we had bumped into, had no severe damage done to it, however, it did have the slightest bit of paint taken off of it.
Lucky for us, Jake's astra was left undamaged &the guy we had encountered the accident with wasn't acting too irrationally, wasn't too severely pissed off &it wasn't a heell serious accident (aka, we weren't injured &we didn't die)
Jake &the other driver exchanged license and insurance details and the rest of it and Jake is waiting for a call from him sometime this week.

K, yeah that is all!
Enjoy your weekend!

'Til next time!

4/5

2010-06-23T10:44:00.002+08:00

4 down, 1 to go!

Sorry for the lack of update,

Last exam tomorrow!

Chyee boy!

Wish me luck!

Will properly update soon

Improper post

2010-06-12T10:37:00.008+08:00

in love with my new berets that jake bought for me.
he bought me a red, white and purple one :o)

raar!

things to do today-
study, study, study for my legal framework and elements exams on monday!
my grandma, uncle michael, aunty winnie and the kids are headed back home to singapore today, so we're taking them out for lunch at dim sum- somewhere in winthrop &dropping them off at the airport.
yeah, k will properly update when i have time yeah? :)
xxx

It will not be all for nothing

2010-06-11T17:48:00.010+08:00

yeah, this happens occasionally after a long day of studying. pictures from my dodgy, crap quality webcam:o)

& yes, i do feel rather frenchh:')

squinty, asian pride!

& again

dear mr beret,

could you sit properly on my head please?

it would be kinly appreciated?

kthxbye

&sex hair!

Hello!

Can't stay long, yeah, these next two weeks are going to be very unpleasant for me!

So entertain yourselves while i'm gone with my un-hideous pictures that i don't take while i'm studying!

Bye!

Something special

2010-06-06T17:07:00.010+08:00

a little chill time/ bbt sesh @icey-ice :)

ehehehe mmm, our oreo's icey-ice :'o)

weee! asian laaa, with the camwhoring ahaha

Let's pull an un-spasticated face!

K, kk serious face, serious face!

'RAWR means i love you in dinosaur' :)

Heyeyey, how's everyone doing?

Did we all enjoy our long weekend?

I know I certainly did :')

Woot!

Quite a productive study sesh t'day, I'd have to say.

Compare to the usual, anyway

Just sat in my room, with my lappy the whole day and worked on all my portfolio's for elements of crim.

Did so well without the distractions of the internet, I think I did something like 6 pages of work :)

Anyway, these were some pictures taken yesterday, when Lils, Jake & I went to the city and harbour town.

Had such a nice, chilled day yesterday so I thought I should make up for that today, seeing as I'm working tomorrow and with exams drawing nearer and all!

K, that's all for now!

Ciaooo! :o)

Today was a fairytale, I wore a dress, you wore a dark gray t-shirt

2010-06-04T15:35:00.017+08:00

You told me I was pretty when I looked like a mess, today was a fairytale.

Check out how long my fringe has grown out! weee! :)

Highlow!

I love a chilled, make-up less day at home, dressed down in just a hoodie and trackies.

TEEHEEHEE! :')
My hair and fringe have progressively grown since the last time I cut it :')

Getting my hair dyed soon, after exams to darken the natural brown to blonde highlights in the ends of my hair! ;)
It's been forever ago since I've last done anything my hair!

So I'm pretty excited and am looking forward to it! :)

Yay!

Oh oh, oh and my grandma, aunty, uncle and my two little cousins- Dawn and Darryn arrived in perth this arvo :*)

The End.

And there was me and you

2010-06-04T13:38:00.009+08:00

"You know that feeling you get when everything goes perfectly, constantly and nothing's ever wrong with anyone or anything? Yeah, me neither."

I am still currently sick, but I am recovering.

I have a heap of work to finish and to work on, but if I put in the effort, thing's will get done.

I have more than enough things on my plate to remember before exams, given again, the time and effort and if keep trying, I will remember.

You might be in a bad place in life right now, but if you keep going, you can't be stuck there forever!

Yeah, I called up ally today and

OHMYGOSHH, I FOUND MY USBBB! (L)

(I'm going to pick it up with Jake when we go to the city tomorrow, he hasn't been in ages cause he's always got work!)

That there, is another piece of evidence really,

that prayer really does work!

And you don't just pray, take your worries back and go worry about it all over again.

When you pray, you have to really just give up your worries and BELIEVE!

I believed that I would find it and there we go, I did!

K, off to study and catch up with the workload noow cause exams are soon!

But heck yes, bring on the looong weekend! :'o)

Fair enough

2010-06-03T21:37:00.007+08:00

Hey guys!
How's everyone's day been for them so far?
My legs are so, sooo tired!
Went for a good session of retail therapy in the city, with the girls from tafe this morning :)
Followed by late night &movies with my boy at carousel :)
I dare to say, I went flat out, crazy and spent a good 300 bucks on clothes!
I bought 2 dresses from ally, 2 tops from ally, a top from forever new, 4 jackets- 1 from ally, 2 from cotton on and a brown leather jacket from valleygirl, 3 beret's- 2 from cotton on and 1 from forever new & a new clutch purse :')
TEEHEEHEE :'B
Yay, for having clothes to wear this winter!
I'm all ready and stocked up so yeah, pretty happy about that :) :) :')

On a less cheery note,
AND ONLY DID I NOTICE THIS AT THE END OF THE NIGHT, but it must have been whilst i was clothes shopping with the girls in the city todau, but somehow still, i managed to lose my thumbdrive today!
Yeah, the one i wear on my wrist.
Yeah, the same one i got from influencers.
And yeah, THE ONE THAT ACUTUALLY CARRIES ALL OF MY WORK ON IT! :'(
The worst thing about it is, i don't even know where and i don't even kmow how:( all i know is i lost it and I WANT IT BACK! :(
This really just upsets me greatly and makes me want to cry because i thought to myself this morning, 'naaa, don't bring it, just incase you lose it... you dom't even need it today.' then i thought 'but what if you did? ahh we'll just bring it, just incase.' turns out, i didn't need it today!
AND THE ONLY REASON I BROUGHT IT TODAY, WAS JUST TO LOSE IT! :(
I think i remember it being on my wrist when i was trying out clothes and then it got in the way of my sleeve so i think i took it off, which is probably how i lost it!

ARGHHH 357#$%RGDWUEGWJBSBD VAJBDAKNAL !!! :(
I want it back!
And I want it back NOW!
It had ALLLLL my essays on it, for each and every class!
I WANT MY WORK BACKKK:(

Jake,

2010-06-02T22:05:00.018+08:00

Would you believe me, if I said I didn't need you?

'Cause I wouldn't believe you, if you said the same.

All I know is you mean to me, more than you'll ever know.

The way you make me feel, it's more than any feeling I've ever felt.

The way you make me feel, it's the best feeling in the world.

I love you,

A hundred reasons why.

1. I love the way you make sure I have everything I need, 2. how you say the cutest things over and over, and it never gets old, 3. I love the way you act like a dork just to make me laugh, 4. the look you make when you get jealous, 5. the way you act as if I’m fragile and breakable and take such care with me, 6. how you listen to me talk for hours, 7. I love your fast replies, the way you text me just to see how may day is, even when you know I’ve no credit to reply, 8. I love the way you always find a way to see or talk to me, 9. how you would do anything I say, 10. the way you get my attention, 11. I love how you’re not afraid to tell me your feelings, 12. I love the way we talk on the phone all night, the way you spend all your money to buy calling cards for me. 13. The way you're so worth it, 14. I love how I can be myself when I'm with you, 15. I love the way you very nearly bought a plane ticket to fly out of the country for me when I tricked you into saying that my flight back had been delayed to surprise you, 16. the way you love me, 17. the way I love you, 18. I love how you're never boring, 19. that we're not just show and tell, 20. how you always try and distract me from thinking about anything when I'm scared, 21. how you are always there when I need someone to talk or cry to, how you love me for who I am, 22. I love how you let me give you a detailed description of how I spent my day and when you listen, I know you're really listening, 23. I love how we both know that together, we can work out anything, 24. I love you because you make me feel like I've never felt before, 25. Because you know when I’m not okay. 26. I love that when you hold me, all the troubles in the world vanish, everything falls into place and becomes alright again, 27. You always know how to bring a smile to my face. When I need to cry, you lend me a shoulder and a tissue, 28. I love that when I'm with you, nothing else seems to matter. 29. Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure. Every moment with you, is time well spent. I love that I feel so at ease in your arms I love you because you bring out the best in me, 30. Because of you, no matter what may come tomorrow, today my life is more complete, 31. I love how you always say what I need to hear, 32. How all the little things you do, make such a big difference in my life, 33. You've seen me at my worst and yet, you still love me, for who I am, 34. I enjoy being with you, 35. You're selfless and kind, 36. I love the way you always try to help others, 37. The way you always look for and find the positive in life, 38. The fact that you know exactly where you are going in life and will do whatever it takes to get there, 39. How you always understand me, even when I don't myself, 40. The fact you refused to ever completely grow up, 41. The way we are interdependent on one another, 42. How you always help me when I need or ask you to and sometimes even when I don't, 43. How you're always concerned about me and my well-being, 44.The amazing way you seem to be able to read my mind. 45. The way we're able to finish off each other's sentences, 46.The way you apologise for every little thing, and everything for incase you do anything wrong, when most the time, it’s not you and you haven’t, 46. How I know you'll always be here for me through the good and the bad, 47. How cute and adorable you are, 48. Your determination, when once you set your mind on something that nobody can change it, 49. How easy it is for us to talk about our dreams and visions of our future, 50. Every little single detail about you, that makes you who you are and the fact that you are the bestest boyfriend anyone could ever ask for, 51. You always make time for me, 52. The way your gorgeous smile always lights up my day, 53 You say the cutest things that make me laugh, 54. How you will refused to do or say anything to ever, ever hurt me, 55. How you manage find the best in everyone, 56. Beside being my boyfriend, you are also my bestfriend, 57. Because I can tell you anything and you won’t think any less of me, 58. I love that you always bring out the best in me, 59. Your laugh, your beautiful singing voice, your voice, the way I can't not smile when you sing to me, the way I love your singing and you singing to me, 60. I love how we can talk without saying a word, 61. The way you always reassure me and I feel indestructable, as if nothing in this world could hurt me as long as you're here, 61. I love how you always wonder what I’m thinking, 62. how I always want to know what you’re thinking, 63. I love the way you always strive to be the best you can, 64. I love the way you kiss me, 65. The way you want the same things out of life that I do, 66. I love how we can do absolutely nothing yet, still have fun, 67. How you always hold me together, and remember things for me when I have too much on my mind, 68. I love how you are always on my mind, 69. I love how I had to team some of these up to make it all fit into 100 reasons, 70. I love how I know I’m always on yours, 71. I love how it is always so hard for me to leave you every night, and how I can’t wait to see you the next day, 72. I love how complete I feel when you hold me in your arms, 73. I love how two weeks can feels like an eternity without you, 74. The way you make me anticipate wonderful tomorrows, 75. I love when you tell me you miss me, 76. I love your smile, 77. I love the little things you do for me, 78. I love how you would do anything in this world to make me happy, 79. I love how you always think about how your decisions will affect me and in turn how i think how my decisions might affect you… 80. Then the way you apologise for crying over something silly, 81. The way your tears make me want to change the world so that it can't hurt you anymore. 82. I love the way you get your point across without destroying mine, 83. I love the person I am, when I am with you, 84. How you notice all the small things. 84. The way you act as if it's the end of the world when you see me get hurt, 85. Just how much I trust and believe in you, 86. The way I know how we both will never give up on this. 87. Every little effort you put into our relationship, 88. I love trying to get a tan at the front of carousel with you on sunny days, 89. cuddling with you and embracing wintery ones by being in your presence, 90. The way some people dedicate posts to each other, the way you dedicate to me, a whole blog. 91. The way you tickle me to make me laugh. 92. The way you make me think things through before I go off and do stupid things when I'm angry, 93. The way you let me win, 94. The way I can share all my problems with you and the way you help me get through them, 95. The way you have just become such an important part of my life, and me; a part of yours, 96. The way we are always there for each other, 97.The way we don't care what other people think, or say, 98. The way you can see right through me sometimes, 99. I love our love, the way we were meant for each other, 100. And they way this list of reasons was so easy to write, but also so hard at the same time because I had to limit myself to just 100 reasons. I can think of over infinite reasons why I love you and why I am the luckiest girl in the world, to call you my own. :')

And that's why I love you.

And the stars, they shine for you

2010-06-02T21:51:00.004+08:00

You know life is going well when however much it may seem like a dream, you know it's not, and you don't mind that.

When your dreams have become a reality.

"Learn from yesterday,

Live for today,

And have hopes for tomorrow."

Pre-exam days

2010-06-02T17:48:00.015+08:00

Greetings! :')

Thanks for bearing with me and sorry for the irregularity/ lack of update.

And sorry in advance if I'm slow on updating these next few weeks.

I don't know how, but somehow tafe and that is just eating up all my time right now. It really has just been consuming my life and sapping all my energy.

As a result of this, I always seem to be tired and unfocused :(

And worst of all, exams are soon :'(

Hopefully though, after my exams...

I'll have time to get my bum around to a licencing centre to get my L's so that I can start learning to drive because I, myself know that I have been putting this off for way too looong and knowing how to drive, would just make life so much easier!

Anyway, how has everyone's week been treating them so far?

I am currently still sick right now and I'm not getting any better.

My pre-exam days consist of-

Having to get up at 7.30am to make it on time to a 8.30am start, while we're approaching winter (which I never seem to be able to do, it is life's most impossible task for me! mind you, I am no way, at all a morning person)

and

Being stuck in the middle of the week with a lot and a lot of essays and assignments to finish :'(

And honestly, I don't know which I'm hating more at the moment!

Stayed up 'til 3am this morning desperately trying to get done all my law of personal property essays I had to submit today.

If it's anything, I need to learn to be more organised.

Anyway, enough of that,

I'm pretty happy with and am liking my plans for tomorrow :)

I have scheduled in a session of retail therapy with the girlies!

&then i'm going for late night with my boy!

Which is exactly what I need :)
I miss spending actual time with my boy!

Oh oh, oh and I almost forgot!

My relatives; grandma, uncle michael, auntie winnie &their kids (darryn and dawn) are coming to see us and arrive from singapore this weekend!

It's been too long since they've come to pay us a visit here in perth!

Can't wait to see them all! :)

As cold enough as it is for us, imagine what our winter's going to be like for them!

It's going to be fr-fr-freezing! :o/

So yeah, with that being said,

Remember to takecare and stay warm, kiddos!

K, all for now.

'Til next time!

Can I keep you?

2010-05-31T22:38:00.006+08:00

Think of the person you'd like to be with the most right now, when did you last talk to them?
Today. but if you want specifics, say half an hour ago- over the phone for close to 2 hours just talking about life, cause that's how we roll :'o)
When did you last really like someone?
Now.
Text or call?
Both?
When's the last time you did something you knew was wrong?
Can't say I have, reccently
Do you find the opposite sex confusing?
Occasionally
Who was the last person to call you?
Jake
When was the last time you cried?
Today

Who was the first person you talked to today?
The bus driver
Do you like holding hands?
Sure?
Is there someone who you instantly smile when you talk to?
Yess
You're crying at 12 at night, you call?
I don’t
Have you ever been called heartless?
Don't think so?

How often do you get drunk?
Less often
Do you like your life at the moment?
It’s fine
Who did you spend most of the day today with?
Joy, Martika and Jess J

What’s the relationship between the last person you texted and you?
My mother

Who did you last go out to eat with?
Jake &his family
How late were you up last night?
2am
Have your parents ever caught you drinking?
Well...
Last person you were in a car with?
Jake &aunty jenny
Is someone mad, because you’re dating the person you are?
I don’t think so?

If you could describe your day in one word, what would it be?
Fine

And that's just life for you

2010-05-30T20:20:00.004+08:00

The lecturers have been going crazy with the homework and the assignments and exams, exams, exams!

It wrecks havocs with my brain.

The stress has gotten to my head and as a result, I'm in the foulest mood pretty much all of the time!

I get annoyed so easily,

even at the slightest things.

I hate this side of me.

This is when you have to believe me when I say,

it's not you, it's me!

Jigsaws falling into place

2010-05-28T20:35:00.020+08:00

My body is at a stage where I am literally mentally and physically drained. :( :'(
Another thing, it feels so good to have fallen off the radar lately when you’re normally right under it for being the main source for gossip and whatnot :')

Anyway, this one's to all my girlies!
Aha i'm sure i've read this a dozen times but i can never get sick of this one hey!

Life only comes around once, make sure you spend it with the right person.

"Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot,
Who calls you back when you hang up on him,
Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead,
Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats,
Who holds your hand in front of his friends,
Who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you.
Who turns to his friends and says, ' That's Her!"

And that's my boy for you, right there :')

I know I'm in good hands
And I seriously couldn't ask for anyone better!

I lovers you! :o)

Time capsule

2010-05-28T14:53:00.001+08:00

Let's take a snapshot of where we are in life;

Dear future me,

Wherever you may be right now and wherever you're headed, I would like to remind you that you are here at this point, only because you have gone through all that you have, learnt all that you’ve learnt and worked hard towards getting what you want to achieve in life. Mid-year exams up are coming up for you and you’re halfway through getting your diploma. You know you can't expect to achieve competent results if you don't put in the effort, although I'd like to commend us, up to this point, for we have put in the effort. Remember the person you want to be, the one you want to become. It'll just make life that little bit easier for you if you set your priorities in life, avoid negative people, quit trying to fix others, smile more, be prepared for rain, remember to breathe sometimes, take each day at a time, prepare for the morning the night before and have goals to work towards.

Think, right now is the time to make ammends, it's out with the old and in with the new. Know that there are consequences to the decisions you make. Learn from your mistakes, pick yourself off the floor when you fall. Don't let petty things get to you so easily, you're greater than that. As mum always says, learn to love yourself. If it's anything i've learnt, it's that mum's always right. Live your dreams and face your fears. Don’t give up now. Don’t half finish things. You can’t expect to get recognition for completing half a diploma. So it's either diploma or no diploma and really, the choice is yours. You and I both know this is important to you. After this year, you'll have this. At least you will have something to take from it, to get you somewhere in life.

Please, please try to always stick it through until the end. Never forget that hard work pays off, so with that alone, you’ve got only your best to give. Felicia, sometimes you just stress and stress way too much to know what's good for you. But please, don’t stress. This is a better mindset for you. Be good to your mental health. Along with prayer and hard work, trust that you will do well. Thank you, thank you, thank you for putting in the effort, this year. Keep at it! Please eat right and get a decent amount of sleep. Do treat your body, health and immune with care, as it has been good to you all these years. Once again, good luck! I wish you well.

From, present me.

Let's not take a single thing for granted, shall we?

2010-05-28T12:42:00.000+08:00

Whether it be time, the people we love, our health, our immune systems, the shelter we are provided with, the family and homes to call our own, even the air we breathe...

Let's not take any of that for granted.

Because it's only when you're so close to losing it, you think twice before not appreciating all that you have.

Because you realise it's too late to cry over it, when it's gone.

I came across something today which really is what I think sometimes but what better way to put it than in the words of miss gzillaaa-

(with reference to: gzillaaa.blogspot.com)

topic: true love&happiness v fancy university degree.

"if someone you adore only adores you because you have a degree in your office, are they in love with the idea of being with someone intellectual, or are they in love with you?
if someone you adore only adores you because the money you earn is easy money in their pockets, are they in love with the idea of being with someone filthy rich, or are they in love with you?

now YOU tell me,
do you need a uni degree to be swept off your feet and be treated like a princess? do you need to attend university to be able to love someone? do you need to go to university to proceed on with your life?
the answer is no. of course not.

you need someone that is utterly in love with you to sweep you off your feet & treat you like a princess. you need someone to experience to joys & despairs of falling in & out of love to give you their very best shot. you need someone that can take their own experiences with life to proceed on & learn from their mistakes."

yeah so i don't know about you, but i thought that was really well said.

Sorry for the lack of update, a quick post today.

Right now i am currently busy with sick,

will remember to not take being healthy for granted.

Has too much work to keep my occupied right now.

So time too.

Will properly update this when i have time.

K, all for now.

Bye!

"To you, it might just be the chemicals inside us changing. All I know is our bodies reward us for being with each other."

The strange, unfamiliar distance

2010-05-18T13:58:00.000+08:00

"Don't give the crowd what they want. If they knew what they wanted, they'd be on stage. Not you."

"When you're at the top, remember what it felt like to be at the bottom.

When you're at the bottom remember what if felt like to be at the top.

Good doesn't last forever.

Neither does bad."

And we wonder why on earth we ever wanted to grow up

"You were a dream. Then a reality. Now a memory."

"The dirt you and I could share forever would grow a tree so high it'd kiss a star, each leaf a promise, each stem a new beginning."

"And if I blink my eyes enough, maybe I will wake up and you will still be there sleeping next to me."

If we focused on all the unhappy parts of life, we'd forget to see the beauty in it.

"Dear Future You,

Hold on.

Please.

Love,

Me.

Dear Current You,

I’m holding on.

But it hurts.

Love,

Me.

Dear Past You,

I held on.

Thank you.

Love,

Me. "

This is an extract from Lillians blog.

Which I liked.

"I had never known stability but I had always known that it was possible.
I had never known safety but I had always wondered what it would feel like.
I had never known love but I had always believed that it was real.
I had never known you but I had always looked forward to the day that I would.
Thank you for giving me the stability I always craved, the safety I always sought, the love I always desired and the person I always needed.
Thank you, thank you, thank you."

And the world said that we could never be together

2010-05-14T13:23:00.000+08:00

Thus with a kiss, I die.

-Romeo and Juliet.

I don't have the greatest memory, so probably the only line I know of shakespear.

Aladdin: You, uh, you don't want to go for a ride, do you? We could get out of the palace, see the world.

Jasmine: Is it safe?

Aladdin: Sure. Do you trust me?

Jasmine: What?

Aladdin: Do you trust me?

Jasmine: Yes.

Artist: The Bee Gees

Preferred version by: Yun

Song: How deep is your love

Favourite past time: having in sung to me by Jake. :')

I know your eyes in the morning sun

I feel you touch me in the pourin' rain

And the moment that you wander far from me
I wana feel you in my arms again

And you come to me on a summer breeze

Keep me warm with your love then you softly leave

And its me you need to show

How deep is your love?

Is your love
How deep is your love

I really need to learn

'Cause we're livin' in a world of fools

Breaking us down

When they all should let us be

We belong to you and me

I believe in you

You know the door to my very soul

You're the light in my deepest, darkest hour

You're my saviour when I fall

And you may not think that I care for you

When you know down inside

That I really do

And it's me you need to show

How deep is your love?

Is your love

How deep is your love

I really need to learn

'Cause we're living in a world of fools

Breakin’ us down

When they all should let us be

We belong to you and me

And you come to me on a summer breeze,

Keep me warm in your love

Then you softly leave
And it's me you need to show

How deep is your love?

Is your love

How deep is your love

I really need to learn

'Cause we're living in a world of fools

Breakin’ us down

When they all should let us be

We belong to you and me

Rose: Hello, Jack. I changed my mind. They said you might be up here-
Jack: Shh! Gimme your hand. Now close your eyes. Go on! Now step up and hold onto the railing; don’t peek.
Rose: [breathless] I’m not.
Jack: Step up onto the rail. Hold on. Hold on. Keep your eyes closed!

Jack: D’you trust me?
Rose: I trust you.

Transcript from the scene "I'm flying"
-From The Titanic.

Now I'm in the mood for The Titanic or a meaningful, romance film.

Fallin' for you

2010-05-14T12:56:00.000+08:00

And I know that, I know you'll always be there to catch me when I fall.

I just need you to know that I am always here, to do the same.

Artist: Colbie Caillat

Song: Falling For You

Edits: Felicia ( In bold)

I don't know but

I think I may have

Fell for you

Dropped so quickly

Maybe I should

Keep this to myself

Waiting 'til I

Know you better

I am trying

Not to tell you

But I want to

I'm scared of what you'll say

So I'm hiding what I'm feeling

But I'm tired of

Holding this inside my head

I've been spending all my time

Just thinking about ya

I don't know where to

I think I've fallen for you

I've been waiting all my life

And now I found ya

I don't know where to

I think I've fallen for you

I've fallen for you

As I'm standing here

And you hold my hand

Pull me towards you

And we start to dance

All around us

I see nobody

Here in silence

It's just you and me

I'm trying

Not to tell you

But I want to

I'm scared of what you'll say

So I'm hiding what I'm feeling

But I'm tired of

Holding this inside my head

I've been spending all my time

Just thinking about ya

I don't know where to

I think I've fallen for you

I've been waiting all my life and now I found ya

I don't know where to

I think I've fallen for you

I've fallen for you

The checklist

2010-05-12T16:09:00.000+08:00

May, a busy month?

Neverrr!

AMOUNT OF ESSAYS TO COMPLETE:

only enough to drive me to temporary insanity.

Legal framework.

x4 questions.

Research assignment.

DISLIKE.

Criminal Law
x6 questions.

Evaluate court case assignment.

Elements of contract
Consideration
~~Clarke v Boss~~

~~Dad v Bozzo~~

~~Bird v Worm~~

~~Bank v Alan~~

Capacity to contract

Steinberg v Scala (Leeds)

Law of personal property
Pledges and Pawnbrokers

x1 essay

Chattels Security

x2 essays

~~Mother's day~~

Samantha's 10th birthday

Dad's 51st

Gran's birthday

Flqp &Jc's 6 month anniversary

~~Land myself in a big-ass debt~~

Complete my Diploma

Make things work at home, with the family

~~Learn that crying doesn't fix a thing but sure as hell makes me feel better~~

~~Am a teenage girl taking a hell of a ride on a hormonal induced rollercoaster~~

~~In love a~~~~nd happy~~

Winter shopping :'o)

The list above, of essays doesn't even include studying for my next set of exams.

You have to admit, that's kind of sad.

But yeah, other than the ridiculous workload, having this feeling that I might be getting a little sick and the conflict and issues with the family,

Life is great at the moment.

"You know you love me, xoxo...

Gossip Girl."

I'm really and honestly not that obsessed, i've just been watching too much of it lately ;)

Okay then,

Until next time!

The shortfall

2010-05-12T15:35:00.000+08:00

Everybody has their own stories and well, this is mine.

SO CLOSE!

I just received my exam results back for 'law of personal property.'

I received a 71%

and I just missed out on an 'A'.

To be exact, 4% or 2.5 marks off.

So it did matter that I had missed that bit of information which I had forgot to include.

But I now know, for next time just to work that little bit harder to get that A.

So that will be my motivation until then.

At the library at the moment.

Attempting to work on the many assignments.

Wish me luck.

What else.

I miss my J to the C, my bay to the bee. aha :')

And that's pretty much it.

All for now.

Signing off,

Felicia.

Two can play this game

2010-05-12T10:24:00.000+08:00

"3 words, 8 letters, say it and I'm yours."

-Gossip Girl.

Hello y'all, from my practice and procedure class at tafe :)

This might just be a very unorganised, messy post about everything.

Have nearly caught up with the workload for this class.

And so yeah, here I am blogging.

If anything, there was something I realised just reccently.

Well, I've known it all along, only it didn't click until say last week.

Call it an epiphany but they say it takes two to tango as it takes two to fight.

If you just stepped back a little, gave way a little, or down from the battlefield altogether, Wouldn't there be a little less friction?

A little less to fight about?

Making you the bigger person.

Although I can't talk,

Because if it's anything I have inherrited, it is my total need to prove a point.

But I know now, it doesn't have to be like that.

"The only way something dies is if you stop feeding it."

-Joyce Meyer

Another thing.

Approaches.

Responses.

Or how you address an issue.

There are different was of approaching an issue, different ways you can go about it.

Hm, think this. Say if I were to come complaining to you about how I had to get up at 8am this morning, you could either respond by saying "aw honey, that's okay. At least you know you haven't wasted half your day by sleeping through it."

or you could respond by saying "are you sure you've come to the right person to complain? I mean look at me, I have to get up at 6am everyday. Who cares about you."

See the difference?

Choosing the way you respond to things could either make you a less or more likable person.

Even if they're just little things.

And I believe that everything happens for a reason.

So yes, that's what I've learnt.

Hmhmhmm *hums* what else.

This class drags on for way too long, I reckon.

Starts at 8.30am and finishes at 12pm.

Oh, I wish I had learnt italian properly all through primary and highschool.

I regret not.

The reason being, I would really like to travel in Europe at some point of my life, Italy or Rome being one of the destinations I would like to travel to.

I was even in extention LOTE class at one stage and still, I don't know very much.

Alrighty, that's all I got on me right now, I think.

Hmhmmhmm *hums* until next time! :)

What if?

2010-05-11T14:41:00.000+08:00

Hi everybody!

How are we?

I am currently at the library working on the many essays that I have yet to finish.

I am also waiting for a particular someone to get off work so that we can go watch a movie at carousel, later tonight. :)

I have currently completed all the one's I had to do for 'valuable consideration' and only have the one left on 'capacity to contract' before I've finished all we had to do at the moment for elements of contract.

And that's just for elements of contract alone.

We still have my stuff for legal framework, law of personal property, practice and procedures and criminal law.

Yes, anyway enough about the educational aspects of my life.

So what has happened in life since the last time I wrote?

Well, the workload is piling up. Majorly.

A shitload of birthdays and events are coming up and happening this month.

And well apart from that, I can't think of much else.

Ooh, watched 'letters to juliet' last weekend with my beloved sister and Jake.

I was inspired by it.

We decided that besides being really, really predictable, the movie itself was alright.

But yes, the movie did get me thinking.

Life is built on the decisions we make.

The decisions we make decide what type of person we are, the person that will become of us.

We go through each day and the biggest decision we make without even realising it is choosing to get up every single morning to another day.

we pick from a closet of clothes and choose to wear, we choose from a menu what to have for lunch, whether to go to that mates 18th or to stay home and finish that major assignment due the next morning, whether to do this or whether to do that.

Most of us monitor the things we choose to do, how it might affect the people around us and what the eventual outcome may be.

It is the little decisions though, which make the big picture.

Little decisions you make right now, like putting a little extra time studying that sub-topic you didn't get, or putting a little more time into the family will develop the perceptions that people develop of you, where you want to get to in life and the person that you are.

But sometimes, we stop ourselves from doing things we want to do and it's not because we can't do them but it's because we're too scared to try. You have to ask yourself - Do you want to live your life asking... "What If?", "Why Didn't I?" or "It could have been different..." Its the journey you take that's important, not the finish line.

You can always, always, always try new things. Remember, there are two outcomes when doing so- you can win or you can lose. If you win, all the better. If you lose, tell yourself . "I tried, I gave it what I could." I think that's the most important thing in life - because, we don't come back and sometimes we don't get a second try. Sometimes we don't know what we want. If we don't - at least we give it a shot - I guess we'll never know. I guess whether you win or you lose, not knowing would be the biggest loss...

I suppose the main message is you never know if you never try.

Alrighty then, until next time!

Productive study session, please

2010-05-07T14:29:00.001+08:00

Life may knock you down sometimes, but that's life. You choose to get back up.

Hello readers!
How are we?
Just a short post today, for the sake of updating.
I really should be studying right now.
Haven't done much of that lately.
Yes, anyway I better catch up with my workload now before I fall even further behind.

it really is, the mentality.

"You're my hunny bun, sugar plum, pumpy upmy upmy umpkin.
You're my sweetie pie.
You're my cuppy cake,gumdrop,shyummkums pure,The apple of my eye!
And I love you so, and I want you to know that i'll always be right here.
And I love to sing this song to you Because you are so dear!"

Toodles my twinkle toes, shortcake, fairyfloss, sugar pie!

Until we meet again next time!

So, who do you idolise?

2010-05-05T17:26:00.000+08:00

Hey!

How are we all today?
Good? :')
How's everyone's week been so far?
I just got back from the city and I feel like I haven't been too unproductive today which is good but I'm also feeling quite tired at the moment so this might be quite rambly.

Today, I bought the criminal law book I need for when I start my new class tomorrow and that alone cost me 100 bucks! :(

And I have a tonne of work I need to get done by tomorrow, none of which i've started.

What else? ah yes, I was considering getting my "since 1992" tattoo done today, on the lower part of my back, just above my crack :P but I wasn't sure, so I left it.

However, my buddy Mark got his done today :)
He decided to get a tattoo like the one on David Beckham which got me thinking, we all have our idols, somebody we look up to, someone we admire.

Who do you idolise?

It could be a celebrity, a gaming charcter, a person, a friend, anyone.
We all have people or factors that influence what we choose to do what we choose to believe and the decisions we make in our lives.

Who influences you?

Because I have a good idea of the one's that influence me, the one's I idolise.

Okay, so here's a picture of the tattoo David Beckham has done.

& the tattoo translates into:

"Death and life have determined appointments, riches and honor depend upon heaven.”

or a better translation would be:

“Life and death are decided by fate, wealth and honor are from heaven.”

Mark right after he got his tattoo.
Not the best photo, but the only one I was manage to capture on my phone.

It looks as if it cains like crazy, huh?

Getting it done above his ribs and all but yeah, he stuck it through and did a good job at making look like it didn't hurt as much as it might have.

What a brave kid!

Anyway, that's all for now.

Off to start my workload due for my new class tomorrow so that i can fit in a gossip girl session somewhere, maybe later on tonight.

Until next time!

The absence of oxygen

2010-05-04T18:33:00.000+08:00

I am suffocating, it's like cling wrap, tightly around my face.
There's no simpler way to put it,
I cannot breathe.

We are all trying to figure out who we are in this world,
who our friends are,
where we fit in,
what type of person we want to become,
what we want to do with our life,
just where we fit on this earth.
And what makes us, us.

In life, you learn to read between the lines, you learn why things are different shades of grey and not just black and white.

You learn why some things work out, while others don't.

You learn that when love doesn't work out or when your heart feels like it's been put through a mincing machine; you'll survive.

That even though your chest hurts like crazy and you think it'll never go away, sometimes, it does; and it fades into a warm fuzzy memory. That the obstacles are there to see how you handle them. That even though crying doesn't solve anything, it sure as hell makes you feel better. You learn not to sweat the small stuff.

To differentiate between those who want to see you fall from those who will see you soar.

A reason to start over new; and the reason is you

2010-05-04T16:23:00.000+08:00

That's what you never got. It takes an entire lifetime to write the words "And they lived happily ever after."

"When you lived here, it was a city. When you left, it became a town. "

"I'm a picture without a frame. A poem without a rhyme. A car with three wheels. A sun without fire. I am a gun without bullets. I am the truth without someone to hear it. I am a feeling without someone to feel it.

This is who I am.

A mess without you, something beautiful with you."

"While you weren't listening, all our love songs became sad songs."

"There are a million important things to do. But none as important as lying here next to you."

"You close your eyes when you cry. That's okay. Just don't keep them closed too long. Things have become beautiful since you last looked. There's nothing more to cry about."

"I'm fine. I just break sometimes. Just understand that if I break, I'm breaking for you."

"Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."
--Paul in I Corinthians 13:4-7

"If it doesn't happen magically over night, you might want to try doing it manually, every day."

For better or for worse

2010-05-04T12:48:00.000+08:00

I just need to be able to tell people I was here, I felt, I lived, I laughed, I cried, I loved.

"It sounds pretty but I disagree. I believe there are moments in your life when you have to dance like everyone is watching."

No, I never read magazines when i'm meant to be studying.
Or anything.

Nor do I pose with the boyfriend's gatsby :o)

"Love is when you don't want to sleep, because reality is better than a dream."

'I'll miss you fron a distance."

photo's taken by me.

subject: lillian.

Footprints In The Sand.

"One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the LORD.

Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene he noticed two sets offootprints in the sand: one belongingto him, and the other to the LORD.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him,he looked back at the footprints in the sand.

He noticed that many times along the path ofhis life there was only one set of footprints.He also noticed that it happened at the verylowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and hequestioned the LORD about it:"LORD, you said that once I decided to followyou, you'd walk with me all the way.

But I have noticed that during the mosttroublesome times in my life,there is only one set of footprints.

I don't understand why whenI needed you most you would leave me."The LORD replied:"My son, my precious child,I love you and I would never leave you.

During your times of trial and suffering,when you see only one set of footprints,it was then that I carried you."

Written by Carolyn Joyce Carty

And here I am, blogging when really, I should be working on them many assignments I need to get done. Yeah, I thought I might add a few photo's to make my blog look more blog-like.
I used to read a whole lot but now it seems like I can never find the time. Well, I've sort of started reading again. I'm currently reading the book my sister had to annotate for english,"To Kill A Mocking Bird" by Harper Lee.
Not much else to say,
Might start some of those assignments now so that I don't fall behind.
Until next time!

Once upon a time, it really didn't matter

2010-05-03T18:40:00.000+08:00

"If you are a Christian, you are not a citizen of this world trying to get to heaven; you are a citizen of heaven making your way through this world."

It's been a year since I've actually last blogged. I thought I might revive my blog as a way to record my thoughts, feelings, to make a note of where I am in life and just write about anything, really. I'm going to try for the whole motivational post because I think it could be what you and I might need at the moment. Okay, so today I learnt that in the real world, it really is no pain, no gain. If you don't put in the effort, don't expect to get results. That's with everything, really. You can apply that to everything you do in life. So what do you expect to get out of it all? What do you expect to see when you actually do try? We have a tendency to "try" for a while, and then when we do not see quick results we stop trying, which is probably what got us into trouble in the first place.

A person may strike a rock ninety-nine time upon the ground, and there may be no evidence at all that the rock is cracking. Then on the one hundredth time, it may split in half. Each blow was weakening the stone even though there was no signs to indicate it.

So the changes in life you ask, since our last encounter?

My 2009 consisted of graduating and therefore surviving highschool, not taking school seriously yet I still passed, learning a great deal about the different types of relationships, being in and out of a long term relationship, attending the year 12 ball, starting and ending friendships, realising that trust is way easier to lose than to gain, gaining trust, then losing it, going our seperate ways, having the security of being in highschool kicked out from under us, entering the real world, going overseas at the end of the year to singapore with family and friends, having multiple break-downs due to being a teenager, haywired with emotions, ditching myspace for facebook, becoming a fan of and joining way too many facebook groups, becoming sleep-deprived and nocturnal, partying like an animal, being mentally and emotionally insecure and unstable, having an ample amount of good and bad times, laughing til I cried, rolling my ankle so bad while dancing around selling chocolates with my sister that my mum had to drive out to get me, crying and laughing at once, getting in trouble, falling into unhealthy eating habits and balancing friends, family, school and work.

2010.
It's only the start of the year, and already I feel that I'm at good place in life right now. I have reccently just started building and developing my religious beliefs. I feel that I have a better mentality, am in a better emotional state, feeling more motivated, determined and overall feeling much better than I did last year. I'm thinking that most of this would be because of a very special person that has always been there to support me through the good and the bad. I have a lot to be thankful for. I would really like to get back into healthier and better eating and sleeping habits, put in the effort to except to see results, with friends, education, family, study and work hard, grow to become a more positive, better and stronger person, hurdle over obstacles that are put in my way, in life, not let what people think or say get to me as much or at the least, get me down, I would like to improve on and develop my social and writing skills, help someone that is maybe less fortunate than I am, I have made new friends, kept old ones and would like to continue to make things work with the family and being able to balance everything from school to friends to family.

Yes, okay i've run out of things. I honestly can't think of anything else worthwhile mentioning right now, so until next time! if there is one. :)

And then there are people, like you

2010-05-03T18:34:00.000+08:00

You don’t ask for someone’s help, be all ignorant, unappreciative (& as if that’s not enough) ,turn it around on them.

If you were smarter, you would have thought up some of your own ideas from your own freaking head &sorted your own shit out yourself.

You wouldn’t be coming to me, asking for my help, (conduct it wrongly) then tell her it was because I told you so.

Whar are you? A puppet? An effing dog? If their owners asked them to go jump off a cliff, chances are they wouldn’t because even dogs can friggin think for themselves.

Because everyone loves reading about everyone elses lives

2010-05-03T18:31:00.000+08:00

You don't have to understand me.
I don't want you to.
So why must you try?

Everyone has their own thoughts and opinions. Just like you. Just because mine don't match yours, don't mean they're wrong. What are you? My analyst?! Stop analysing, questioning, judging, critiquing everything I do.
So what?
I'm not allowed to have an opinion now?
Why are you always making something out of everylittlething.

Chill.
And back the hell off.

Okay, rant over. :o)
Something you didn't know about me, which you know do :]]! I'm not so much of a frequent blogger.
I only blog when I ~~can~~...~~want~~...feel like it!

First post. (:

2009-03-20T21:25:00.000+09:00

On average, we breathe 21 600 breaths a day. With every breath we take, we're a little different from the one before. We are constantly changing. There are somethings we hold no power over, some things we can't change... While others we can.

Maybe right now you're at the decision making part in life, Maybe life's full of decisions... Questions, and un-resolved answers... Maybe you're still unsure. Maybe life's just full of maybes.

As for my title (:?
Everyone lives in some form of fiction... Although the fiction differs, the underlying reasons are the same. The need for escape is always there. It's universal understanding.

--

Every blog needs a first post. Well, this is mine. Just a easy, light way to start.
And perhaps a few things to think about. (: